A Cat Has My Tongue...And I Want it Back!

First of all, Happy Easter/Passover to anybody that reads my blog. This is certainly a day to be with family, friends, and the such on a great day like this. Now on to my dilemma.

Everybody is sitting around a table. Having glasses of wine, talking about gods know what, enjoying themselves to the utmost power. What am I doing? I'm sitting there with a mental block, unable to enter the fray of laughs, conversation, and the great art of bullshitting. I sit there with a blank look on my face, wondering when it's going to be my time to bust out of my shell. I wait and I wait and I wait hoping for the opportunity to say something or have something come up in my mind to share with the entire group, but nothing comes out. I just sit there trying to enjoy myself but with a mind so blocked up with thoughts or lack there of I just sit there as time flies by. Being able to act on instinct and throw yourself into the fire is something that I crave. Putting myself out there for all to see is something that I strive for, but for some reason I can't do it. Maybe I need something to relax myself, something that is just going to clear my mind and allow myself to be the person I want to be. Is that answer a pill? I don't think so. I think it's just plain old peace of mind. But how do we find that? Where is the answer that gives us such a thing? Is it a breathing technique? Is it this or is it that? I would love to find out the answer, because right now, I just want my tongue back.