I honestly can't remember the last time I had a bad day. If I have had a bad day then that day was quickly over turned by a good one. It never used to be the way though. I can remember when bad days were the norm for me. I would wake up being afraid of what the world would have to offer. I would be afraid of doing the simplest tasks like going to the store and having to ask for a pack of cigarettes or going to work and having to sell products to customers. Well those days are long gone and I'm a much happier person for it.
How did I do it? Honestly, I think the best thing that I did for myself was to stop taking my medication. Is that something that every person with bipolar should do? Absolutely not! But I think I came to a point where I didn't need it anymore. I was actually relying on it for a crutch then anything else. I would go to my doctor on a regular basis and ask her to increase my medications because I wasn't feeling well. She whole heartily agreed with me and sent me on my way with another prescription for either a new medication or an increase of an existing one. Sometimes that would work but it would only happen for a short period of time. It was a never ending cycle of appointments and heart ache that continued with me for the longest time. I never thought I was going to break out of it.
Slowly but surely I started to break the chain. At first it was just taking the medication that was prescribed to me and not taking an extra dose or asking my doctor for more. Then it turned into me missing a dose or two of a certain medication. Then it came down to me just not taking what was prescribed to me. Was this the best course of action? Probably not, but I was making my decisions prior to these events so nothing had really changed.
Well now i'm on nothing. The only thing that i'm taking right now is a multi vitamin and some omega 3-6-9 pills that are supposed to be great. I also take a 5 hour energy on the regular which definitely improves my focus at work. But other then that i'm completely clean. Can you do this? You might be able to, but of course consult your doctor first. And if you don't consult your doctor please be very careful. Monitor yourself very stringently so if anything does happen you have the resources you need to help you get back on.
And always remember: there is more out there then just medication. Never rely on a pill to give you happiness. It might be a quick fix, but it is never a long term solution.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
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4 comments:
I really appreciate you sharing this. I recently dropped the medication I was on for bipolar- Lamictal- because I felt that it was more of a 'magic feather' that was losing its spark then an actual needed chemestry fixer. I would much rather find balance through natural means if possible. Omega 3's are getting more popular and I've started taking them too. It's also great to hear you're feeling good so often. I haven't quite reached that point but I'm definitely trying to get there!
Happy to know that you are handling the bipolar thing well, without meds. I stopped all (after 30 years of trial and error) back in March of this year. I must say, even with the Omegas, etc., I don't feel any better. BUT, I don't feel any worse. Actually I DO feel better, because the reason I stopped the meds was because the last one I was taking,Lamictal, made me suicidal. I often mention that, which I realize might be wrong, because there are certain people for which that medication works. You just have to be careful. Anyway, thanks for sharing. I look forward to reading more about your journey. Marco http://bipolarized.wordpress.com
A Taoist story tells of an old man who accidentally fell into the river rapids leading to a high and dangerous waterfall. Onlookers feared for his life. Miraculously, he came out alive and unharmed downstream at the bottom of the falls. People asked him how he managed to survive. "I accommodated myself to the water, not the water to me. Without thinking, I allowed myself to be shaped by it. Plunging into the swirl, I came out with the swirl. This is how I survived."
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